Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Summer Flings with Boobs

It's Wednesday! And we are thrilled to welcome Mindy "Shoot 'em in the head!" McGinnis and her amazing boobies!
(insert voice of Sixteen Candles Grandma)"And they are so perky!"

Summer Fling...

Even the phrase makes me get goosebumps, but not in a good way. More like when you think of something horrific and just wrong, like a dog walking on its hind legs for a long period of time.

 Why? Well, a summer fling implies swimsuits – bikinis even. And right when my fellow female classmates had discovered that they looked pretty cute in them, I was discovering that I had boobs. Again though, not in a good way. Refer back to the dog walking on its hind legs analogy.

 My boobs showed up way before anyone else’s. They walked onto center stage and DEMANDED attention, which wasn’t hard to get since I was also taller than everyone else and my nipples were right at their eye level. Boys in their thirties might think that’s kind of awesome, but boys that haven’t hit the actual teens yet are pretty much just terrified.

And their fear of my boobs translated into calling me an Amazon, which now that I’m older I rather take as a compliment. But it’s kind of hard to encapsulate feminine mystique and nobility when you’re head and shoulders above your friends and all the boys automatically assume you’re a lesbian because you can beat them at any sport.


(Oh yeah, that happened early too. Thanks, Mama Nature).

Wearing a bathing suit in front of my classmates happened approximately once, and ended with someone moo-ing at me and me subsequently attempting to drown them. Fast forward to me in high school and suddenly the boobs aren’t so much a drawback anymore. People kind of like them. I get a lot of, “Hey, I wish I would’ve been nicer to you back in junior high.”

Yeah, I bet you do.

Especially since Amazons have such long memories. 

Mindy McGinnis is a YA author and librarian. Her debut dystopian, NOT A DROP TO DRINK, will be available from Katherine Tegen / Harper Collins Fall, 2013. She blogs at Writer, Writer Pants on Fire. You can also find her on Twitter and Facebook.

Tomorrow Mindy will featuring Honestly YA as part of her BOA (Bloggers of Awesome) interview series. Thanks Mindy!


CareyCorp said...

Hey Mindy, great post. We are sooo thrilled to have you. I'm easgerly anticipating NOT A DROP TO DRINK!

Incidentally, I got moo-ed in high school too. Glad you got the last laugh. :)

Melissa Landers said...

Hey, girl! Thanks for visiting. Thank your boobs for me, too. :)

Lorie Langdon said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Lorie Langdon said...

Hey Mindy! I got the "amazon" comments, but not the moo's since I had no boobs to speak of, ever. ;) Cheers from one amazon to another!

Unknown said...

Happened to me too. ;) I was the tallest in class and had the biggest boobs. The mocking never stopped and I felt really bad about it, bothered me a whole lot. But then high school came and I wasn't the tallest or 'boobiest' anymore. These days I quite like the whole boobs things, except for when running down/up the stairs. That still tends to be a problem. -.-

Matt Sinclair said...

When I was in school, I don't think I ever had a problem about girls developing. As a father of two girls, however, I can start to imagine how this might be change.

BBC said...

Carey - yeah those "moo-calls" still burn. I get all flustered in cow barns to this day.

Mel - DONE! They say hi.

Lori - Cheers! Yeah, when I was older and knew what an Amazon actually was and what they stood for, I was like, "Hey that's actually kind of awesome." And *then* I learned that the more dedicated Amazon women cut off their right breasts so they could draw their bows more easily. And then I thought, well... rifles are just easier.

Aleks - We share the pain, friend. Yeah, it was not *easy* developing before everyone else. I've got some horrific pictures of my ugly puberty days, and I share them with my high school students who are suffering. I'm like dude, do you know the ugly duckling story or not? Let me show you y 6th grade picture...

Matt - Chivalry isn't dead, we've got you :)

Kimberly said...

Your post cracked me up! I always loved the whole look-who's-laughing-last type of thing. For me, it was kind of the opposite. I was always the shortest. I wasn't flat, but I definitely didn't have any attention-grabbing boobies.
My daughter is 12, and many of her friends are developing at a quick rate. The boys claimed last year to like the girls who has "something goin' on up top." Which kind of annoys me that they say it, but I'm super glad they aren't looking to start grabbing my seventh grader's boobs. Some things never change. It's amazing the conversations I have with my daughter about this stuff already. Eeeeeek.
And for all those boys who didn't think I had anything "goin' on up top," I have them now! So there! :-) And they really aren't that big of a deal.
Thanks for visiting with us! I can't wait to read your book.

Jessica Lemmon said...

I had the opposite problem! Until I gained a good 20 lbs. ;-) hilarious post, Mindy!

BBC said...

Kimberly - Oh, indeed. I really do think that when to comes to boobs the grass is always greener on the other side. People w/out boobs want them, people with too much wish we had less. Sigh.

Jessica - Thanks lady :) Beer helps grow boobs, I hear.

A.M.Supinger said...

LOL! Great post, Mindy!